My Story

by Victoria

 

Copyright © 2003-2005, by "Victoria".

All rights reserved

(en espaņol)

 

I always wanted to write about my life story. I thought it would be interesting for some people, but I never had the opportunity-courage to do it. Now, I think is time to actually write about it.

I sadly see all the time the way transsexual women are portrayed on TV, news and magazines. We are more than that. We are hard working individuals capable of doing whatever we want to do. Yes, some trans women do work in the sex industry. However, a good number of us are models, actresses, scientists, professors, artists, doctors, writers. We are somebody's mother, somebody's step-mother (like myself), somebody's wife, sister, friend, lover, confident.

My name is Victoria and I am a post-op TS woman.

I was born in South America in 1971 and emigrated to the USA in 1990. When I arrived here I had a High School Diploma under my belt, the desire of achieving a lot of goals and a tongue that spoke NO English.... That was my first obstacle, so I went to school and studied English for two years. Nowadays I can call myself bilingual!!!

I was raised in a very traditional family. Women and men had their roles very well defined, and for a young person trying to fit into those roles, knowing that you "belong" to the other group, was be very difficult. However, I must confess that my experience growing up was very comfortable and loving. Luckily I did not have to face rudeness, discrimination or abuse.

I knew I was "different" at an early age. I never had to stop and think how I was or why I was "different". I was just me.

Since grammar school all the way to high school I attended an all-male facility. Fellow students and faculty liked and respected me, probably because all through the years I gained the respect by being one of the top students. And also by helping the other boys with their academic problems. I guess I kind of create a protective shield around me by being their tutor.

I recall, when I was around 9 years old, reading an article about a "guy" who had a Sex Change in the city I was born. That memory stood with me for years to come. I knew then that I will eventually do the same thing. I did not know how long it was going to take, but I knew I would get there.

In my early years in the USA I worked various jobs. From low paying positions to a well compensated career in Real Estate.

In 1995, I met Anjelica Kieltyka, my drag-mother, at a very well known gay and drag bar in Chicago. When I met her she was mentoring some Latina Transsexuals and she had asked me what was I doing there? If it was OK with me being in a bar full of gays, drag queens, and transsexuals??? I told her I was transsexual as well!

She freaked out. She said NO WAY !!!. I smiled and said Yes. I guess she had a hard time believing me. After all I have been BLESSED. I never had to use electrolysis, never had any type of face surgery and my voice(somehow) is "passable".

My "relationship" with Anjelica had begun.

She was THE main part in my transition. She helped me, from contacting the doctors for my SRS Recommendation Letter, to getting hormones, to buying clothes at the thrift stores!!!!! Oh crazy Angie!!!! I LOVE HER.... I do not tell her enough times that I really appreciate her, and that I appreciate what she did for me and for others.

I started taking hormones sometime in 1995. During this period I worked in the Hotel Industry and had the chance to meet a number of famous people. I do not know if I should name them but all I can say is that they are very well know actresses, actors, singers, politicians. etc. All of this time I was not allow (neither I wanted) to dress as a woman. Co-workers knew I was a boy and dressing in women's clothes would not had been a good idea after all.

In March 1998 I requested six weeks off from work. Four week later I was BACK !!! I was VICTORIA, then. Everyone talked about me. I never heard any bad commentaries and I was never made fun of. It was a once in a lifetime experience for everyone at work. After all not too many people get to work with a person and 4 weeks later that person is completely a new one. Just like I did at school, here at work I gain respect from the rest by being a "model" employee. I was employee of the month in February (as BOY !!) and in May I was again employee of the month (as GIRL!!!!!). On the bulletin board I had to pictures a "before" one and an "after".

I had SRS done in Montreal. Yes !!! I am a Menard's Girl. I was schedule for surgery for December 1997. I had to cancel it and re-schedule for March 1998. This move was meant to be. It was destiny. By doing this move I end it up meeting my best friend, my new sister "Ashatan". We clicked right away, she was about my age and we basically like the same things. One funny thing is that when I flew from Chicago I had a ticket to TORONTO not Montreal, where I was meant to go. I was already nervous about the whole thing and having the wrong destination made it even worse!!! Until this day I do not know who made that mistake. It probably was me when I order the ticket over the phone.

I had to buy another ticket form Toronto to Montreal, so I got to my destination 6 hours later. I was already broke!!! and this extra expense make it even worse. Great start for the beginning of my new life, isn't it????.... Surgery went great. "Ashanta" was operated after I was. I am SO thankful that I had the change to share that experience with her. We cried on each other's shoulders. We held each other's hand when in pain. We sang each other to sleep almost every night. We became more than friends, we became sisters. Until this day we call each other regularly. I call her for advice and she calls me as well. She got many phone calls and flowers at the hospital. I did not. I was jealous of it. Only a few friends knew about me being in Montreal. No one in my family knew. During the 3 years of my transition (that about how long it took me from taking my first hormone shot to having SRS) I kind of pull myself from the family. We were not up-set to each other. We just kept in touch through phone calls.

When we finally got back together I had already my sex change. It was March 2000 when I went to a family reunion. Exactly 2 years after SRS. I was pretty nervous. No one had seen me before, except for my mother. No one seemed to be bother about it. No one seemed to care. Again, I showed confidence on myself and I guess I projected that to them.

In march 2001 I met the person who now is my husband. I really love him, he is a cool guy. He puts up with my temper and for that alone he deserves recognition!!! At the beginning of our relationship he did not know the fact that I had a SRS. I did not have to tell him. He found the doctor's Affidavit and he confronted me. I did not tell him anything at that time because I did not know where the relationship was going. When he found that letter we had been dating for just 2 weeks so felt it was too early to tell him. We moved in together and after a few ups and downs we got married on December 2001. He gave me a wonderful stepson to whom I adore. His son and his (my husband's) family do not know about my past. We want it to keep it that way.

After SRS I worked in the Hotel Industry for another 4 years. On October 2002 I got my Real Estate License and began a career on it. I like doing what I do now. Money is good of course and I get to meet a lot of people. I am content and looking forward to a fun and complete future!

Victoria

E-mail Victoria