Kelly's Story
 
Kelly Van De Veer

Singer and Actress, Netherlands

http://www.bigkelly.com/

 

 

 

 
Hello, Dr. Conway,
 
I can't tell you how it made me feel to be on your site, as a TS success. I can't tell you, because you know better than me, what it's like to be a success.
 
I just wanted to take this time to tell you a little about me.
 
The basics? My name is Kelly Van De Veer. I live in Hilversum, in the Netherlands... I'm twenty years old. And, Lynn, I'm happy.
 
I've seen so many site, on transsexuals, and my story is their story. A young boy, with friends who thought it weird, that I brought "Barbies" into class.
 
I liked to dance---to move; ballet to jazz. I was appreciated by my teachers....I mean, a boy who liked to dance! Lynn, it was great for me.
 
At 12, I was on TV, here in Holland. I learned so much. I loved it. But then came Highschool. I identified so much with what was me, with myself,
 
but the outside world (not, the "real world") of Highschool had such a hard time being where I was. I received so much, changing in the girls room,
 
dancing, being who I am.. I was born a way, and I was expected to live that way. Be that way. But what we see, is not always what is.
 
Lynn, it hurt.
 
I left Highschool, and became a hairdresser. I modeled, as a boy. But, I used "him". I used "him", to become her. So much time went by,
 
I was trying to decide, for myself, to let others know who I was. To say, hello, my name is Kelly. I became a show girl, a drag queen. I entered travestite shows.
 
I got famous as Kelly, the Drag Queen. I just wanted to be Kelly....period.
 
I had been taking hormones since seventeen. I had my surgery at nineteen. I was luckier than most. My parents, my sister, my boyfriend...they were there for me.
 
They were in the hospital, crying, supportive of me. God, I realize that i was luckier than so many.
 
After the surgery, I felt so free. When people tried to bring me down, I remembered the happiness. The feeling, of finally being who I am.
 
My boyfriend? He was (is) so important to me. But after the surgery, I felt the need to be like the girls in high school. I felt that need to be seen, to be desired.
 
I miss him. I have my family, but with him it did not work.
 
I am so young. But I know a few things. Treat people the way you want to be treated. Love them, even when they hate you.
 
I'm an actress, people know me, here in Holland, WOW! What better than the admiration of people? Well, the admiration of self.
 
The ability to love others. To reach out to others. I am a transsexual woman. I am happy. If i lived my life in reverse, my choices would be the same...
 
I want to reach out to those young girls in Holland, in confusion...to raise the lamp, and say, this way....it's ok, it's hard...but this way.
 
 
Kelly